She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize