she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize