Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I wanna passion pit in your ass
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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