JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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