your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
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