so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
