Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
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