But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
