So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize