3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
i permit you to call me
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
