no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
He felt like a one man threesome
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize