? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
The adults are the big ones right?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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