oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
My dick has a subreddit
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Randomize
