She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize