i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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