Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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