watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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