Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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