i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
