So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
