If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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