Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize