She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
