that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize