she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just high enough for therapy.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
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