I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
