I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
did i just pee glitter
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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