Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
