i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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