it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
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