he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Randomize
