i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
