have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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