and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
