I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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