I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
