Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize