I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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