YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
