did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
