The maid of honor just puked.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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