oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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