I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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