Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
