I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
