I think I died a long time ago.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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