She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
