I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
