I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
