apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
