We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize