i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
