your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
